FemaleCanadaMember since 18 Aug 17Last online 2 years ago

just a broke teen with nothing better to do:))

  • rose440
    2 years agoReply
    1 Like
    Chapter 2| Very dark, but very interesting! I especially love your formatting. THE FORMATTING IS SO GORGEOUS LIKE I CAN'T. Perfect punctuation and grammar, but I noticed that you like to put a space after the first quotation mark, which pains me, because I'm used to having no space after it. Continue to write with spaces separating the paragraphs, it makes your writing a bit easier to read and more organized.
    Alice In Madness Vol. 1 ( R+) ( Movellas Friendly Version)
    Alice In Madness...
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    This story is about main protagonist, Alice Anne Arlington. Alice had lived a completely normal everyday life until one day when things went wretchedly awry and a wretched series chain of traumatizing...
    Steven Will -Dream Walker
    Thank you and I'll definitely be fixing everything up. :)
    Steven Will - Dream Walker
  • rose440
    2 years agoReply
    1 Like
    Chapter 1| My Grammar Nazi side is starting to kick in. Very minor punctuation slips here and there (punctuation inside of the quotations, spacing out paragraphs to give a little more emphasis,) but very descriptive. You introduced enough characters and gave a little backstory to help us understand her situation better, which I absolutely love! However, I noticed that you used the phrase, "I ___" alot in the beginning of sentences (especially in the paragraph talking about Alice getting ready) and it's a bit repetitive. Perhaps you could try to use it less? Ex: Instead of "I walked towards my closet and grabbed my school uniform. I took it off the hanger and laid it out on my bed," you could say,
    "Walking towards my closet, I took my uniform off of it's hanger and laid it out on my bed." It has a little bit more flow, ya know? Overall, very chilling and intriguing. Very nice work!
    Alice In Madness Vol. 1 ( R+) ( Movellas Friendly Version)
    Alice In Madness...
    825
    4
    22
    This story is about main protagonist, Alice Anne Arlington. Alice had lived a completely normal everyday life until one day when things went wretchedly awry and a wretched series chain of traumatizing...
    Steven Will -Dream Walker
    Thank you for the first review, I will definitely take you're advice. :)
    Steven Will - Dream Walker
  • rose440

    mumbled "REVIEW SWAP"

    2 years agoReply
    Anyone want to do a review swap with me? My writing is a little cringey and the events happen a little fast, but I'm still growing:)
    Also, HEY Y'ALL I HAVEN'T BEEN ON HERE IN 9 MONTHS ITS YA GURL @[Mrs Panda]
    Steven Will -Dream Walker
    Awesome! It's quite disturbing but I hope you like it, it's in progress.
    Here's the link:
    Alice In Madness Vol. 1 ( R+) (...This story is about main protagonist, Alice Anne Arlington. Alice had lived a completely normal everyday life until one day when things went wretchedly...

    What story would you like me to read and review?
    rose440
    2 years ago
    Could you please review this one? Thanks!
    Addicted| ongoingWhen Hera Foster's rebellious cousin Patricia turned her parents' cafe into a wild, raging strip club, she knew that it would be the end of her. Landon...
    Steven Will -Dream Walker
    Yes, certainly! You're welcome. :)
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